


i think it went oh, oh, oh

by lotts (LottieAnna)



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Animals, Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Gift Fic, Zoo, and both of us love the zoo and happy lesbians who are in love with each other, i wrote this because i love my best friend, that's literally the entire plot, they're lesbians and they go to the zoo and it's a nice day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-23
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-07-11 23:23:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19936222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LottieAnna/pseuds/lotts
Summary: “There are other animals we need to show love to,” Alex says. “Besides otters.”“Like lions.”“Zebras.”“Elephants,” Dylan says. “Wait, do they have elephants there?”“There’s only one way to find out,” Alex says, standing up.





	i think it went oh, oh, oh

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Stromesquad](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stromesquad/gifts).



> IF YOU FOUND THIS THROUGH GOOGLING, KNOW ANYONE MENTIONED IN THIS STORY PERSONALLY, OR ARE MENTIONED YOURSELF: please, please click away. This is a work of fiction and nothing written in this story is true. Any accurate information used in this story is publicly available information about public figures, the rest is made up, 100%.
> 
> happy birthday ali :)

Dylan is not a morning person, but her girlfriend is, which works out a lot better than you would think. 

It helps that Alex falls asleep whenever, and if Dylan’s in bed next to her on her phone or laptop, it doesn’t make a difference. It also helps that Dylan doesn’t particularly like staying up late, so she’s happy to feel a little more tired a little bit earlier. Early is relative, of course, but midnight is better than 2AM. Plus, if Dylan does actually manage to get to bed at a reasonable, human hour, that increases the likelihood of Alex falling asleep while spooning her. 

Before Alex, Dylan would’ve insisted that falling asleep while cuddling was impossible; now, she can’t imagine anything more comfortable. Realistically, this happened because Dylan got used to it, but she likes to chalk it up to the fact that Alex is an exceptional cuddler. 

Oh, also, they have a dog who demands to be taken out at the crack of dawn, and  _ will  _ bark about it if he’s not leashed up and ready to go by the time the sun is in the sky. So Alex’s morning person-ness comes in handy for that, but it doesn’t always save Dylan from having to wake up. 

Usually, on those mornings, Dylan will roll out of bed, walk to the kitchen, and make coffee while Alex is out, because if Ralph is that loud, Alex usually rushes out the door without food or caffeine. And Dylan might like sleeping in, but she  _ loves  _ her girlfriend, and very much enjoys finding ways to make her smile. 

It’s nice. Alex will come back from walking Ralph, find that Dylan’s already made the coffee, then come back to the bedroom—where Dylan has invariably already found her way back under the covers—and give her a kiss on the cheek. 

She’ll whisper “Thank you,” and Dylan will open her eyes long enough to see that Alex’s smile, and then she’ll fall back asleep for a few more hours. 

…… 

The day is July 23rd, and the time is 10AM. 

“You could’ve woken me up earlier,” Dylan says, padding into the living room. The coffee pot has been moved to the coffee table, and there’s an empty mug with Dylan’s name on it, both figuratively and literally. Design-wise, the mug looks terrible, because Mikey made it at one of those paint-your-own-pottery places and given it to Dylan as a Secret Santa gift a few years back. What it lacks in beauty, it makes up for in sentimental value and function. Any gift that holds coffee is a good gift, in Dylan’s opinion. 

“It’s our anniversary, and I know you like your beauty rest.”

“It’s not beauty rest so much as, ‘let’s hope I don’t look and feel undead’ rest.”

“If you were a zombie, you’d be the prettiest zombie of all,” Alex says, in her most sincere voice.

“And you’d be the most beautiful of all the werewolves,” Dylan says, pouring herself some coffee before plopping down on the couch next to Alex. “You know I’m fine waking up early when we have somewhere to be.”

“But if we go at lunchtime, we’ll dodge the crowds,” Alex says. “Mornings are busy because that’s when families with kids are there, right? By noon, kids are getting cranky and bored and hungry, and that’s when we strike.”

“You’re a genius, babe,” Dylan says. 

Alex smiles. “I know.” 

…… 

It takes some serious soul searching for Dylan and Alex to admit that they don’t want to go to the aquarium. There are  _ otters  _ at the aquarium, and Dylan and Alex are very loyal people. 

At the same time— 

“It’s too nice out to spend so much time inside,” Alex reasons. 

“We’ve seen the aquarium otters so much,” Dylan says. “There are otters at the zoo. We need to show all otters love.” 

“They’re shy otters, though,” Alex points out. “We never see them.” 

“Well, we need to offer them our support from afar,” Dylan says. 

“True,” Alex says. “Also, isn’t the zoo, like, free?” 

“Is it?” 

Alex shrugs. “Last time I went, we just walked on in like it was a park or something.” 

“Huh,” Dylan says. “That’s really cool, actually.” 

“There are other animals we need to show love to,” Alex says. “Besides otters.” 

“Like lions.” 

“Zebras.” 

“Elephants,” Dylan says. “Wait, do they have elephants there?” 

“There’s only one way to find out,” Alex says, standing up. 

Dylan joins her. “I mean, we could also look it up.” 

“Okay, technically, but I was trying to be cute about it,” Alex says. 

“Fair enough.” 

……

Dylan stops in her tracks right outside the gates. 

“There are people here with dogs,” she says. “What if we could’ve brought Ralph?” 

“I’m sure they’re not allowed in the actual zoo,” Alex reassures her. 

“But what if they are?” Dylan says. “What if Ralph could’ve become best friends with a zebra? That’d be so sick.” 

“I’m pretty sure Ralph wouldn’t be able to get close enough to befriend the zebra,” Alex says. “And I’m pretty sure that if he did, they’d just start arguing about something.” 

“How does a dog argue with a zebra?” 

“Do I look like a zoologist?” Alex says, shrugging. “Anyway, I’m gonna look it up again, but I’m 90% sure you can’t bring a dog here.” 

She does look it up, and, as it turns out, you can’t bring a dog to the zoo. 

…… 

The Lincoln Park Zoo otters are, as usual, nowhere to be seen. 

Good news is, the seals are losing their shit when Dylan and Alex get there, and it’s everything Dylan could’ve ever hoped for. Seals are hilariously fast, and also enormous. It’s hard to not root for that. 

…… 

“Oh my god,” Dylan says, in absolute awe of the sight before her. “It’s so  _ small.”  _

The tiny monkey jumps from one branch to another. The older monkeys in the cage seem uninterested. Dylan knows they’re monkeys, but that just seems wrong. Even monkeys should know that baby monkeys are amazing. 

“I know, babe,” Alex says, squeezing her hand. 

…… 

There are these things called chacoan peccaries. They’re, like, boars? But furry? With these skinny legs and puffball bodies and absolutely no time for anyone’s bullshit. 

Dylan and Alex are absolutely losing it over those guys. 

“It’s like a kindergartner tried to draw a pig, and nature was like, ‘okay, yeah, I can work with this,’ and then made  _ that _ ,” Alex says, pointing. “They’re majestic, Dyl.” 

“They’ve gotta be the cool kids of the zoo,” Dylan says. “They’re the Plastics. The Pink Ladies. The Heathers.”

Alex gasps. “Can we adopt a chacoan peccary and name it Heather? Please?”

“I think they’re endangered,” Dylan says. “Plus, it might not get along with Ralph.”

“Maybe they’d come to an understanding,” Alex says. 

“Maybe,” Dylan says. “But apparently people thought they were extinct until recently, so.” 

“Man, it must’ve been awful living in a world without these guys.” 

“You didn’t know they existed until, like, half an hour ago.” 

“Exactly,” Alex says. “Dark times.” 

“I don’t think they’d like our apartment, babe.” 

“I know,” Alex says wistfully. “It’s fine, they’ll just live in my heart forever.” 

“Mine too,” Dylan says, leaning over to kiss Alex’s head.

…… 

Sometimes Dylan forgets how big some zoo animals are, and then she goes to the zoo and is abruptly reminded. 

“Babe,” Dylan says. “Oh my god, babe, are you seeing this?” 

“The hugeass camel in front of us?” 

“Yeah,” Dylan says. “Babe.” 

“Yeah?” 

“It’s enormous.” 

“I mean… camels are like that.” 

“Is this what horses look like to you?” Dylan asks, and Alex shoves her, which is fair. A cheap shot for a cheap shot. 

“You’re such a dick,” Alex says, sounding so fond that Dylan has one of those casual moments where she feels like she might have a heart attack because her girlfriend really does love her, and she loves her girlfriend, and it’s wonderful. 

“You’re only short because gravity loves you more than it loves me,” Dylan says. 

Alex looks pleased with that. “Damn right it does.” 

“But I love you the most.” 

“And I love you even more than that,” Alex says. 

They’ve been having this same argument for many years. Neither of them will ever admit defeat.

…… 

“Hey,” Dylan says, stirring the strawberry shake they’re currently splitting, “I’m really glad we’re best friends.” 

“So am I,” Alex says, grinning. She leans across the table to steal a sip, even though she knows Dylan would hand it over if she asked. Dylan suspects that she just wants to be cute about it, which is pretty fair. Being cute about things comes pretty naturally to Alex. “I’m also really glad we’re in love, or whatever.” 

“That too,” Dylan says. “Thanks for going to the zoo with me.” 

“You make it sound like I was doing you a favor,” Alex says. 

“I mean, I can thank you for doing something I appreciate, even if you also liked it.” 

Alex considers that for a second. “Fair enough,” she says. “In that case, thank you for going to the zoo with me.” 

“No sweat, bud.” 

“Bud,” Alex echoes, rolling her eyes. “I’m your  _ girlfriend.”  _

“Yeah,” Dylan says dopily. “You make me really happy.” 

“I can see that,” Alex says, before she smears a drop of whipped cream on Dylan’s nose. 

Dylan nudges Alex’s knee under the table. 

“Obviously you make me happy too,” Alex laughs, retreating back to her side of the booth as Dylan wipes the whipped cream off her nose. “I’m in love with you, remember? Making each other happy is kind of our thing.” 

“I think there’s a little more to it than that,” Dylan points out. 

“Is there, though?” Alex says. “For any given definition of happiness, you make me the happiest.” 

“I like that.” 

“You like me.” 

“I also love you,” Dylan says. She reaches a hand across the table. “Happy anniversary, babe.” 

“Happy anniversary,” Alex says, taking it. 

Is it the cheesiest thing in the world to tangle your fingers together while sharing a milkshake and staring into each other’s eyes? Yes. 

Do Dylan and Alex do exactly that for the next couple of seconds? Absolutely. 

**Author's Note:**

> hey ali did you know i love you? because i love you! you probably know it's me who wrote this but i'm posting it on anon because you deserve a nice surprise on your birthday. thank you for being my best friend, my muse, the love of my life, and one of the people i admire the most. you're such a loving person and i am constantly in awe of you. i love you for keeps <3 
> 
> eta: taking it off anon because ali saw and read it :) 
> 
> hey other people who read this!!! i hope you also liked it!!! a lot of these are real accounts of my experience at the lincoln park zoo (which is a GREAT PLACE that i would STRONGLY recommend. i went there on my birthday this year and it was fantastic.) i've been there many times and have never once seen the otters :( they did have a tiny monkey last time i was there, and i did cry over him, he was very small and lovely. i once saw someone walking their dog by the zoo and out loud said "god, only a true visionary would bring a dog to the zoo. that's the mark of a true genius right there." 
> 
> [the chacoan peccary is a glorious beast and i must insist that you IMMEDIATELY stan this creature](https://www.lpzoo.org/sites/default/files/styles/animal_detail_main_image/public/cp_lg.jpg?itok=KeKSMn_5)
> 
> (feel free to comment because you liked the story, or to wish ali--for whom this fic was written--the happiest of birthdays)


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